I've been both hearing disturbing reports (through comments on this blog) as well as witnessing certain behaviors myself that are downright inappropriate for Korean spa settings.
So let me just say that Korean spas aren't sex clubs! When I talk about cruising and messing around on this blog, it should be assumed that I mean DISCREETLY and with the consent of everyone involved (including everyone within sight)... if you want to have open sex without worrying about who sees what, there are other places for that. Like here. Or here. Or here.
I go to Korean spas primarily to relax, release tension, and to be in a nudist setting. Yeah, if you're gay, checking out other guys comes with the territory, and sometimes there's mutual interest.
But seriously, everyone should be following these simple guidelines:
- Do not jerk off or have any kind of sexual contact if you aren't certain that everyone around you wants to see it. Seriously, I've heard stories of guys at Century Spa in the upstairs meditation room jerking off in the window in full view of everyone downstairs. Personally I've gone into the sleeping room at Wilshire Spa and seen full-on blowjobs. I wasn't participating. I wasn't showing interest. Likewise at Lions Spa. That's not appropriate AT ALL. Not everyone is gay. And even if they are, not all gays want to see that.If you're the only one jerking off and everyone is ignoring you, you look pathetic. Seriously.
- Assume that anyone walking by or entering whatever area you're in does not want to see it. I, myself, have walked into, for example, the clay room at Century, and seen a guy just jerking off, without any reservations. Never mind that nobody else (there were 4 or 5 other guys in there) was participating. It was creepy. A comment that was left earlier today was about a straight guy who was intimidated into leaving the spa because of sexual activity going on at CJ Spa. This is not what I had in mind when I created this blog. If you're playing around (and, it happens, but maybe you should consider taking it back to your place), make sure you are in a position where you're able to stop and cover yourself BEFORE anyone accidentally walks into the room and sees what you're up to.
- NEVER, EVER touch anyone without their consent. Another time I was in the sleeping room at Wilshire, honestly doing nothing but resting, and the creepy guy next to me, out of nowhere, GRABS MY COCK. There's a word for that, and the word is "rape." He is really lucky that I didn't make a scene, but I was sure thinking about it.
And also? Most spas do have people keeping an eye out for that kind of thing. Despite the reputation that Century Spa has, I know the management walks around all the time looking out for stuff like this--I've seen it myself. None of the Korean spas are really "safe" places for sexual activity, so don't treat them like they are.
I'm interested in hearing others' perspective on this.
Thanks for speaking up. I am often surprised by the conduct at K Spas by the some of the clientele. Just as we adjust our behavior for our work or family environment, we need to adjust our behavior for the K Spa environment. We are guests in their world, especially at the more traditional K Spas. Enjoy the nudity, steaming, soaking, relaxing and socializing. If you want to play go the one of the 10 or more gay bath houses in the LA area. Sure they are not as clean and nice but for the same price or less you won't be offending anyone if you want to j.o. or more in public
ReplyDeleteAmen to that. I mean, I'm all for having a little fun as long as everyone is OK with it and it's discreet. You can tell that some of the Koreans are getting annoyed with all of the Caucasians who are there for action. I'm getting annoyed when I'm not reciprocating the buying signs and continue to receive them. You only make me not want to hang out there anymore either.
ReplyDeleteYour post is so spot on - I am surprised it only has a few comments. I think your etiquette reminders are a good thing. I have been exploring the spa scene for several months and it seems to me that the there is less and less discretion. I echo your concern that the enjoyment of guys relaxing without inhibition could be less free if the blatant lewd behavior isn't moderated with common sense and respect for those not seeking the same environment and activities. Thanks for your leadership on this topic. And thank you for this guide - I refer to it periodically and have found it very helpful and very accurate. Cheers!
ReplyDeleteA buddy of mine told me recently about a disturbing event he witnessed earlier this year at a Korean spa in Orange County. There were four guys openly going at it hard and heavy (full oral and anal sex) in the steam room, with no discretion whatsoever. Of course the guys were soon caught by a Korean man who flipped out. He immediately notified the front desk, police were called in, and all four were arrested. It's idiots like that who ruin Korean spas for the rest of us.
ReplyDeleteWas that the one in Irvine? I heard about some cracking down there.
DeleteThank you for posting this!! Some of us actually are there for a genuinely relaxing experience, I'm a young pretty boy type and tend to get alot of unwanted attention in nudist settings... Of course I take it in stride until someone touches me or assumes I'm down to give them a blowjob because I'm visibly gay. Maybe that way of thinking makes more sense for men living a str8 lifestyle at the spa for their occasional release . It's the same as everywhere else.. Men can be such pigs!
DeleteOh wow STFU if you really didn't want to make your website about sex involving men at spas then don't rate them on a scale of 1 to 5 in regards to cruisiness.
ReplyDeleteDid you even read this blog entry? Because you obviously didn't comprehend it.
DeleteI read it. And while I agree discretion is key, you sound like a school marm giving a lecture about propriety. The same school marm who then fucks the principal in the coatroom.
ReplyDeleteJust say what you really mean. It's okay to have sex in Korean spas as long as you don't get caught. And anyone over 50 should never dare to approach you unless you've send them an invitation on heavy, embossed paper.
Hypocrite.
I am not sure if you have ever been to a Jimjilbang/Spa in Seoul but in many of them sexual activity in the sleeping room is quite common; the Hamilton Hotel probably most famously. Everyone knows it happens and the str8 locals generally ignore it or avoid the sleeping room. The occasional tourist group without a hotel for the night are sometimes startled. The etiquette is generally this. One guy is sleeping or pretending to be asleep. Another pulls his mat up next to him and will move over eventually to be spooning the other guy or groping the guy. If the guy isn't interested he'll grunt or roll over. It is like musical mats all night long. As it gets later many guys just give up and jerk off in the open or a little more discretely. What I am trying to say here is it seems that this is generally an accepted way to cruise and as long as it isn't too crazy the local Korean straights just ignore it or even use it as an anonymous way to get off. There are definitely many guys who will not touch or reciprocate but only allow another guy to get them off while pretending to be asleep.
ReplyDelete